These individual quotes were reportedly taken from actual employee
performance valuations in a large US Corporation:
"Since my last report, this employee
has reached rock bottom and has started to dig."
"His men would follow him anywhere, but
only out of morbid curiosity."
"I would not allow this employee to
breed."
"Works well when under constant
supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap."
"He would be out of his depth in a
parking lot puddle."
"He sets low personal standards and
then consistently fails to achieve them."
"This employee is depriving a village
somewhere of an idiot."
"Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the
plastic thing to hold it all together."
"He certainly takes a long time to make
his pointless."
"He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a
carrier."
"I would like to go hunting with him
sometime."
"He's been working with glue too
much."
"He would argue with a signpost."
"He has a knack for making strangers
immediately."
"He brings a lot of joy whenever he
leaves the room."
"When his IQ reaches 50, he should
sell."
"A prime candidate for natural
deselection."
"Gates are down, the lights are
flashing, but the train isn't coming."
"If he were any more stupid, he'd have
to be watered twice a week."
"It's hard to believe that he beat
1,000,000 other sperm to the egg."
"Some drink from the fountain of
knowledge; he only gargled."
"The wheel is turning, but the hamster
is dead."
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